It is a pretty humbling experience to see a community holding someone special in their hearts and minds, and to witness the outpouring of love, generosity and gratitude unfold in front of your eyes.
I guess when someone is that inspiring, and has touched so many lives, this is what happens for them in the end. From my point of view, it isn’t surprising so many people have embraced my mom and her incredible strength and courage as she has fought the hardest fight one would ever have to fight. I guess nothing should surprise someone who is fortunate enough to call Gaydon Willis, “Mom”.
I didn’t think I would ever be writing anything for her, but when she asked me to, I knew I couldn’t refuse. She so wants another article to go in the paper, and she also wants to let people know this most powerful part of her journey. Since she is unable to write anymore, it is with great honour that I can share with you some of the strength I have been so fortunate to be a part of.
Mom is right when she said there is a lot more to this dying business than she thought, much more to it than any of us thought, and I am sure the lessons will continue long after she has left us.
One lesson I have learned is strength. Mom is proof that true strength is in your heart and soul, it is in the words you speak, the hands you hold and the way you can face each day with a smile before you even know what that day has in store for you.
Perhaps her greatest days of strength have been in the days when she has lost much of her physical strength. I sit at her bedside and hold her hand and even in her quiet restful moments she is teaching me about strength, and how to find peace, even in the midst of the storm.
As she faces her final days, she has faced each day with outstanding courage and gentle grace. Sometimes she has said to me, “Nola, I sound like a baby don’t I?” when a nurse is giving her medication and she winces from the sting of the very thing that is meant to take her pain away. My response is always, “No Mom, you are the bravest person I know, and it is OK to hurt”.
From where I stand, I see her get her medication, never complain and she even says thank you to the nurse who is there, and then I see the empathy in her eyes as she tells the nurse she is her hero, and she must have the hardest job in the world, as it can’t be easy being the one who has to hurt someone to take away their pain.
The biggest lesson she taught me came the other day in a quiet moment when it was just her and I and my two children, and I wondered if she even knew we were there as she slept and I held her hand. She opened her eyes and looked at me and said, “Choose love…always choose love”. She went back to sleep right away, but the lesson was loud and clear.
At first I thought that perhaps I would keep what she said to me all to myself, and not tell anyone else, like it was my precious gift from Mom that was only meant for me. However, when she asked me to do this article I knew right away that this was something that is not only a lesson she would want me to know, this is something that everyone who reads her story should be told, this is exactly the type of thing she would be sharing with everyone if she could still be the person typing on the keypad right now.
It is beyond an honor to be writing this for her now. It is with enormous gratitude that I say thank you to everyone who carried her in their hearts over the years as she has so gracefully and courageously shared her personal story.
It gives me an overwhelming sense of pride to know that she has touched so many lives, inspired so many, given strength to those in times of weakness and most of all given people a sense of hope as they face adversity in their lives.
No matter what type of curve ball you get thrown, Mom has taught us all that you can knock it out of the park, and just because you may not always hit the home run or the game didn’t end the way you had hoped, that doesn’t mean you didn’t win in the end.
I know Mom has won…in countless ways.
