In a recent column, I suggested that the National Hockey League be blown up and restarted under a more reasonable financial structure.
It would upset the players in a big way and please the owners in an even bigger way.
But the bottom line was we would get the best hockey players in the world back on the ice.
That is, if they were willing to play for much less than the ridiculous salaries they are receiving today.
What I indicated was that the players, who at one time were no more than slaves to the owners, had reached the other extreme and now had unrealistic control of the situation.
Getting 57 per cent of hockey revenue monies just doesn’t seem fair. At least, to me it doesn’t.
However, I also suggested that one move was to hire a man with one job and one job alone: to protect the owners from themselves. It was they who allowed this whole mess to develop and get out of hand to where it is today where millions, if not billions, of dollars have already been lost because the two sides can’t make an agreement. Not only not make an agreement, but not even talk like an agreement is even possible.
Anyway, what brings this up is a small circular calculator I picked up recently while doing something I rarely do, which was stop in a bar. That, I’m sure, you’ll know is a joke because most know I like the odd beer and will put five bucks into one of those VLT machines, most times with little or no success.
Anyway, this calculator, which I think was designed by the Saskatchewan Government Ministry of Health, is designed in part to protect gamblers from themselves.
In brief: to tell gamblers just how much they are playing and paying when they sit in front of one of those monsters. Basically, it calculates the average cost of play.
As an example: let’s say you happen to play quarters when you go out, and decide on betting three at a time. That means your total bet for each spin is 75 cents, but your average cost of play per hour is $40.50. In a year, your average cost of play would be $2,106.
But say you go into a casino and want to think you are saving money by playing a penny machine. Knowing that the more you bet the more you can win, you chose to play 150 pennies. That works out to $1.50 a spin, $81 an hour or $4,212 over the year.
I would suggest those are sobering numbers to say the least. I mean, who can afford to give away $4,000-plus a year?
But let’s move down the aisle to a dollar machine, maybe because you just got your pension or, and I’m taking a shot here on purpose, welfare cheque.
Some consider them free money and their arrival means a time to get rich.
At the dollar machine, a bet of $9 would cost, naturally, nine bucks. And, in an hour, you would have wagered $486. Over a year that’s $25,272, and many of us don’t even make that much annually.
The calculator also provides some tips for the player. For example, it suggests it’s advisable to set acceptable limits for losses.
Betting $1 per spin instead of $2.50 will reduce your cost of play by 150 per cent. It’s also suggested you slow down your rate of play.
Playing two seconds slower will reduce your cost of play by up to $21 an hour if you’re betting $1 per spin. You should also take frequent breaks to determine how much money and time you have spent gambling.
It’s further suggested that you only gamble with money you can afford to lose, never borrow money to gamble; never try to win back money you have lost; limit how often and how long you gamble; gamble for entertainment, not as a way to make money and, finally, don’t use gambling as a way to cope with problems in your life.
The use of these machines has been good for the provincial government’s coffers, but they have also ruined many lives. Hopefully, the government-inspired warnings and suggestions will prevent that from happening to others.
Today’s joke goes along with the subject of today’s column. I was in Las Vegas not too long ago when a man on the street came up and asked if he could borrow five bucks for something to eat. I suggested that if I gave him five bucks he’d simply go into one of the casinos and lose it in a slot machine or on a roulette wheel. His response was: “No way, gambling money I’ve got.”
In wrapping up another reason why golf is better than other sports: Fat people and skinny people can play golf. And isn’t that a fact?
